God's Glory

"Do you trust me?"

These are the words I read from my phone screen. It was a message from my best friend. I bet she was unaware God would use her to speak to me tonight. Because, when I reread that message for a second time, the words - clear as day - read, "Do you trust him?" As one with a mind that races quite possibly all of the time, you can only imagine the supernatural serenity that washed over me when I realized that it wasn't my best friend who spoke to me in that moment. I am afraid I might be confusing a few people, so let me give you some context.

I am a young woman who has been both plagued by and blessed with the gift of empathy. It is oftentimes my greatest strength, but if I am not careful, it can quickly become my downfall. I become quite exhausted with feeling so many different emotions all the time, and sometimes, all at the same time. If you could imagine being overwhelmed with every emotion known to man, that would describe my struggle in a nutshell. This being said, the past few months have been quite exhausting; I don't turn my assignments in on time, I haven't been disciplining my sleep schedule the way I need to, and a lot of times, I even forget to eat. You may be wondering how a person could forget to eat, but it is quite easy when the body experiences high levels of stress and overstimulation, leading to a loss of appetite.

Sometimes, I am so tired that I forget I even have a calling to walk into in the first place. And it frustrates me so greatly. I want more than anything to be able to overachieve at my studies and my personal connections with others, but sometimes that is simply not possible. When you constantly pour and pour out of your own cup, without returning to the fountain which refills it, you are bound to run out. How can Jesus quench your thirst if you refuse to go back to the fountain that he sits at to wait for you? He does not have to do that for us, yet he does all the same. He chooses and promises to answer when we cry out to him, and he has sacrificed everything to make sure we have that open door directly accessible to him. I know that I must walk with him and walk in rhythm with him, being careful not to confuse his pace with how fast I feel we should be going. When I tell him to hurry so that we can get to our next destination, he slows down even more and urges me to look at the flowers in the grass next to the sidewalk that we dwell on. He tells me to slow down, and just like that sweet Lily growing over there, to bloom where I am planted; to slow down and listen to the birds chirp or take a deep breath and take in the gust of the wind that carries the ends of my hair.

And what a more perfect time to slow way down than when we are tired? I want to believe that even Jesus sees a nice bench in the grass and says, "Come and sit with me for a bit so that you may rest your weary feet." See, when we rush to get to the next thing so often that we forget to rest in Jesus' presence, we fail to spend quality bonding time with him. When we are so focused on rushing him to catch up with us, we miss out on what he truly wants us to be focusing on. That is when everything becomes all about us, and we remove our focus away from the one that gave us hope and a purpose to begin with. It is as if we do not trust him enough to get us there on time. We act as if we are so entitled that we do not deserve rest because rest is for the lowly and the lazy. But, love, this is not true. We urge those we care about to rest, and that is exactly how Jesus views us.

Naturally, when I heard a still, small voice whisper to me through that text message, I had to stop. I had to write. I knew that I had to tell all of you about the miraculous presence of Jesus Christ. He is the only provider of rest, and while I am sitting here, avoiding to indulge in his Holy Word because I am afraid it will evoke emotion, I have to remember, that no matter how I feel right now - no matter how much I try to avoid what he has called me to - God still deserves the glory. We can be tired all day long, but if God does not get the glory for the little good that we are able to partake in and experience on this earth, then it is all being done selfishly. God is still worthy of the glory. Jesus Christ is still worthy of the glory. That is why we do what we do as followers of Christ. We follow him selflessly and sacrificially because worshipping and praising God sometimes hurts - it sometimes hurts in an unexplainable way that may cause you to want to blame him - but the truth is that we don't deserve happiness or feelings of pleasure. We are here to carry out his plan for his children, and HE is the one who can work out poor experiences into goodness. He can turn our blood-stained tears into little golden drops of heaven if we will let him. If we will simply rest with him and allow him to refill our cups.

I don't know about you, but I know that I absolutely cannot do this on my own - I need him. I need him every day and every hour, every moment. Even in the moments that I feel won't make a difference - because each one of those moments has brought me to the present one. And I am forever grateful for this truth: that God has not forsaken me, nor has he turned his face from me. Remember, even Jesus went to rest in the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights to dwell with God.

If you take anything from this post here today, let it be these 5 things:

1. Rest is not an option, it is a necessity.

2. God is not a help hotline - turn to him always. He is the only one capable enough to restore your hope and to overflow your cup.

3. Bloom where you are planted. Don't rush. Look around and find what Jesus is trying to reveal to you in this season. He cares for you, and he doesn't want you to miss a single blessing ordained by God for you.

4. God still deserves the glory despite how we feel and despite the way people discourage us. It doesn't matter if that worship service looked way more like an emotionally manipulative concert - you were positioned there for a purpose, so it is important that you praise God regardless of how other people try to twist it. Because in the end, God is still worthy of receiving our glory and our praise. Discern God's truth!

5. None of this is about us. We must stop being so selfish. This is all about the one who makes us whole. Without him, nothing good resides within us.

Prayer:

"Dear Lord, my Jesus, thank you for putting this powerful truth on my heart. Please forgive me for not coming to you sooner. Please forgive my discouragement and continue to strengthen me to return to you every time - even when I am faced with spiritual exhaustion. Lord, you deserve every bit of the credit and glory of anything good I have ever done, for I know that the goodness flourishing inside of me is only because of your one and only son whom you sent to die for me. And he died willingly. How wonderful He is; how in awe I am of your goodness. I praise you with every bit of my body and every ounce of strength I could possibly have left. You are my all in all - supplier of my health, mind, and soul. Yes, Lord, I do trust you. You never fail to remind me that you have it all under control - that I can always trust your word and your presence to revive this tired soul and aching heart. Remind me to go back to the place where I first laid it all down, so that I may continue to lay everything down at your feet. I love you, Father.

In Jesus' Name, I pray,

Amen."

Verses:

• Psalm 9:9-12

• Proverbs 3:5-10

• Psalm 23

• Joshua 1:3-9

• Philippians 2:5-11

Reflection:

Ask yourself:

• Am I resting my spirit in the Word or the world?

• What small habits can I change/incorporate to include more of Jesus in my everyday life?

• Am I rushing or postponing God's plan for my life? Am I walking at God's pace or my own pace? If not, is my impatience sowing seeds of irreverence?

• To whom am I giving the glory to? If not God, who or what am I idolizing?

• Do I need to take a step back and reevaluate what I need in my life? Are there things that I am not doing that I should be doing instead?